What You Should Know if You’ve Bailed on Your Resolutions

It’s only the end of February, but I am guessing there are lots of us that have either completely bailed on our new year resolutions or are about to. As much as I love new beginnings like a new year, the start of a new month, or a Monday, the motivation they bring often fades quickly and we slip back into our old habits. Does this sound familiar to you? If it does… you aren’t alone. We can all fall victim to the “as soon as this happens I’ll do this” and the “tomorrow I am going to” type of planning. The thing is, putting things off until there is a new beginning is simply just putting off the hard work. We’re delaying the tough stuff, the hard work, the action that will actually bring about a change. That’s why a few days, weeks or months in, when we are in the thick of the hard work, when it feels like the goal is just too hard to obtain, we give up. We don’t just give up- we make excuses for it. We tell ourselves all kinds of lies like “I am just too busy for this right now”, or “It was an unrealistic goal to begin with”. We say it, and we continue on in our old routines that keep us stuck. And we think it’s all we deserve. 

I think I have told you this before, but this isn’t your fault. Our brains are literally designed to keep us in situations that feel safe. Our old routines, whether healthy or not, are familiar. Familiar feels safe to our brains.  There is a reason for the saying “old habits die hard”. We are literally wired for it. It’s part of being human.

Here is what I need you to know. You can overcome your old habits! You absolutely can create new habits, keep resolutions, and change your life. You can rewire your brain to accept the “new” as safe and familiar. But, you can’t do it alone. There are three things you NEED in order to create new habits and routines:

1. Listen to the Voice Within You- there is a reason why you want to make a change in the first place. Something within you was nudging you, maybe even begging you towards something meant for you. When you have a goal or a desire, it’s for a reason. Your higher self is guiding you. We are all here on earth to share something unique and special that only we can offer. So, if you have something on your heart-it’s no accident. Listen to the voice within you. Pursue the change you are seeking.

2. An Influence- I am not talking about an influencer here, although some of them may be wonderful examples. What you need is to show your brain what it looks like when you obtain that goal. Be it via podcasts, social media, a coworker, a gym friend, etc. When you surround yourself with images of where you’d like to be, it becomes familiar to your brain. About 7 years ago I started listening to podcasts of motivational speakers. Then I started following them social media. I started reading and listening to their books. And along the way, somewhere in the last 7 years, my brain stopped knowing the difference between the ideas that they had, versus my own thoughts, ambitions, and goals.  My self talk had completely changed. It felt safe for me to want more. You can do the same thing.  Be intentional about what you fill your mind with, and influence it with people and things that are in the direction you want to go, not where you’ve been.

3. Someone to Hold you Accountable- this is arguably the most important step in implementing any change. An accountability partner comes in so many forms: a gym partner, a sponsor, a nutritionist, a health coach, a women’s group, etc. When we have someone else to show up for, and when we have to speak the words out loud to another human, they resonate differently. We know that they know, and so we strive to do a little better.  Choose your accountability partner/s wisely. They don’t have to be perfect people, but they do have to be able to remind you of the greatness within YOU and call you out if they think you are selling yourself short. 

I hope that by now you are realizing that you are an incredible force for good. That there is a light within you that deserves to shine brightly. You deserve to accomplish any goal that is on your heart. I also hope that you feel supported and guided in your journey- if you don’t, I am here to help you! If you are interested in pursuing wellness coaching with me, you can click HERE to schedule your FREE initial session. I offer both virtual and in-person coaching services.

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Have a comment or question? Send it to me HERE. Be well!

XX, 

Mariah

*** Disclaimer: I am not a medical professional and this is not medical advice. This is for entertainment purposes only. You should consult a medical professional prior to making any medical or lifestyle changes and decisions. ***